Trust in Hebrew: confidence, security, and hope.
Can also be defined as to abide and rest inside the goodness of God. Being protected, embraced, and surrounded by His companion and favor.
Often time I would wonder, and wonder some more, and then pray after being tired of wondering, asking God for clarity of something that is happening in my life.
Isn’t it why we all keep asking the “WHY?” questions?
Why is this happening to me?
Why am I going through this?
Why is He still not answering my prayer after so long?
Why this and why that.
Simply put, I want to understand what is going on, I want to have a clearer direction and certainty, so I can take a better control of the situation.
Unfortunately, a relationship with God is not about having clarity over our situation. It’s not about knowing exactly why some things happen, and some don’t. It’s not about understanding the why, the what, the how, the where, and the when of life.
It’s about trusting Him, even when everything doesn’t make sense.
Not easy, I know.
In fact, it’s hard. Big time.
I was once more like Thomas, one of Jesus’ core disciples. I had a hard time trusting Him in my everyday life. I couldn’t trust Him enough that He was more than able to provide, couldn’t trust Him enough that His timing was perfect, couldn’t trust Him enough that He had a bigger and better plan for me than my own selfish desire, couldn’t trust Him enough that He loved me more than anything to the point He died for me on the cross, and He made me perfect according to His image.
I was afraid to let Him take the steering wheel and just drive me to wherever destination He had in mind.
And that fear of trusting Jesus; made me not being able to know my Savior intimately.
That was why for many years of being a Christian; I kept on struggling with the same issues over and over again. Self-image, self-worth, bitterness, rejection, pride, jealousy, and many more issues.
Because I simply didn’t know my God intimately.
You see; it’s different between just knowing someone, and then knowing them intimately.
We don’t need to trust a person to know them, but if we want to know someone intimately, trust is required in the relationship.
The same principle applies to our relationship with Jesus.
If we want to have an intimate relationship with Him, we need to start trusting Him.
I know it’s hard, because trust requires openness and vulnerability. As a human, I don’t think anyone like to be vulnerable, since being vulnerable makes us more prone to hurt.
A while ago, when Jesus started having a boot camp in my life, I went through a lot of things that I didn’t understand. There were a lot of unanswered prayers, a lot of closed and opened doors, special people who came and go, a lot of heartbreaks, pain and tears.
And when I started asking questions and doubt began creeping in my heart, I didn’t get the clarity I desperately wanted, or in fact needed to hear. I only got a constant reminder of a still small voice that whispered gently in my heart, “Trust Me”.
What does that even mean? How can I trust on something that I’m not even sure what to trust? What can I trust when everything is blurry and I have no solid ground to set my feet upon?
But so I did.
With confusion, I began to take a small step towards that “trust” He kept telling me to do. I was tired to do things my own way and resulting in dead ends, so I thought, why not this time I actually gave God a try.
When I began to walk seriously with Him, I learned that trusting Jesus is actually a series of decision-making process. It’s not like a magic show where our doubts, fears, insecurities, uncertainties suddenly disappear when we give him the wheel and let Him be the captain of our lives. It’s a daily commitment that requires our decision. Yes, it’s up to us whether or not we want to be in sync with Him today. Not yesterday, not tomorrow, but today. The present.
“Trust in the Lord with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding.” – NLT
“Trust God from the bottom of your heart; don’t try to figure out everything on your own.” – The Message
The more I learn to trust Him, the more He reveals His characters to me, the more I know Him, and the deeper and more intimate our relationship is.
Now that I look back, I’m very grateful that He didn’t give the clarity I so desired, in exchange for a beautiful process that draws me closer to Him.
Trusting Him is the best decision I’ve ever made in my daily life. Not that I never doubt or fear anymore, I still do; but at least now I have more joy and peace just by knowing who’s in charge.
When I trust Him, I begin to realize that clarity will eventually come, but not without first walking the path of trust.
When I trust Him, I learn that He doesn’t require my perfect trust or faith. He simply wants me to be faithful.
When I trust Him, I start to understand that more than He wants me to go on a journey with Him; He wants to go on a journey WITH me!
Ultimately, when I trust Him, I begin to sink deeper in His perfect love.
“Every deep, intimate relationship is rooted in trust. Of course love is at the core of the relationship but without trust you can’t have love. I realized God is about relationship. He is about love ultimately.”
- Mandy Dobbelmann
A few tips that’s proven work in taking small steps of trusting God:
- Allow the right thoughts to settle in our mind by meditating on His words (Phil 4:8)
- Be grateful for everything He has done, is doing, and is going to do (Ephesians 5:20, Psalm 107:1)
- Focus on your journey TODAY (Mat 6:34)
- Communicate with Him (Phil 4:6)
- Don’t wait, do it NOW!
- Last but not least, Let Him be God and do His job :)